We think of Samurais as heroes. Pure. Upholding some kind of personal credo. Untouched by life. In full control not just of their reactions but the elements themselves. Then we transfer this expectation to our gurus, our mentors, our guides and elders, as if they too must epitomise some holier than thou way of being in the world.
We listen to their theories, follow their advice, and begin to modify ourselves in the hope that such devotional practice has the power to make us untouchable. But when we wake up in the night to look at ourselves, to feel for the changes that have been made – changes we have fought long and hard to bring into being – that trusting pupil, eager to be transformed, is now more a mishmash of half-truths and conflicting beliefs. At least that’s what it feels like, groping in the dark for evidence of our new self.
In our reflection, the one we face daily to do our practice, we see someone trying to sustain a particular sense of self despite all the badgering self-talk and lack of worldly proof that whatever we’re doing is making a difference. In this way, our reflection becomes a place where we impose “better” ways, and a means to process our darkness into the light so that it can be removed, remodelled or restored to its former/original/divine version.
And as we notice ourselves engaging our reflection in this way – as a means to an end, as a key to unlock buried treasure – it becomes harder and harder to trust who we are. At all times the better/higher/holier self must be present to mediate our experience of the world otherwise the untrustworthy self will run riot. But even this can be understood without making anyone right, wrong or incomplete.
How To See Wherever We Are As Sacred
If we must exercise perpetual vigilance in order to be safe, awakened, our true/authentic/divine self, then where is the love, compassion and understanding? How can we surrender in a state of vigilance? How can we trust ourselves as Spirit manifest when we have made part of ourselves untrustworthy, troublesome and in need of a better/higher/holier vibration?
And if we are not being trustworthy in this ‘unaligned’ version of self, how can we understand this through Spirit’s eyes where all things are interconnected and on purpose, no matter what? How can we interpret what is happening as sacred? By seeing-knowing-understanding-translating this judgement – the unaligned, the untrustworthy, the negative – as purposeful, we do not need to fix, change or heal anything in order to be who we are. But how do we explain ‘unaligned’ as purposeful?
We know WHY we want to explain being ‘unaligned’ as purposeful. It’s the tribal counsel of truth story. The one where in a certain tribe when someone commits a transgression, instead of being punished or reminded of tribal law, they are placed within the centre of the entire tribe to be acknowledged. Who they are is re-iterated in many ways in many voices as each member seeks to verbalise what is sacred in their uniqueness, and what is unique about their sacredness.
The Boy Who Can’t Sit Still
Take a boy with loads of energy. A boy told to “settle down”, “be good”, “behave yourself” and threatened to be on Santa’s naughty list if he doesn’t do as he’s told. Ostensibly this child is being told “who you are is bad, unwanted and unhelpful.”
But then one day a visitor to the school notices the boys enthusiasm for life and says, “You remind me of a great man I once knew, the captain of a Naval vessel. He had your energy and he used it to accomplish amazing feats no-one thought possible. I’m sure you’ll be just as impressive.”
Now, to the visitor his comments are a way to talk about someone close to him, and to engage the boy who seems full of beans. Whereas to the boy, the possibility of greatness by being who he is, opens a picture of self never visible before. All his “bad behaviour” is suddenly transformed into admiration and adventure!
Be Your Own Tribal Counsel of Truth
So, when you return to the question of how to seek to explain ‘unaligned’ as purposeful, this is the conversation you are having. A conversation about how what is visible as ‘bad behaviour’ might also exist in the universe as part of what makes your uniqueness sacred.